


Funeral

by seekergeek



Series: Companion 'verse [22]
Category: Stargate Atlantis
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fusion, F/M, M/M, Pre-Slash, Valdemar
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-10-30
Updated: 2012-10-30
Packaged: 2017-11-17 09:15:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,265
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/549988
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/seekergeek/pseuds/seekergeek
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"John...John, the Queen just received news about your father." She reached out and grasped both his hands in hers. "I am sorry to inform you that your father has passed."</p>
            </blockquote>





	Funeral

"Rodney, she's your sister," John said reasonably as he slipped a clean shirt over his head. It felt good put on clean warm clothes after teaching outside, especially since the cold had hit.

Rodney ceased grading papers at John's table and glared at him. "Yes, she is. Which means I know just how horrible it will be. And her husband is a _vegetarian_."

"Midwinter is a time for being with your family though," John replied as he put on his pants. "And now that you’ve taken classes with Vala, you're not likely to Fetch her into the nearest lake by accident."

"And where exactly are you going to spend _your_ Midwinter?" Rodney asked suspiciously. "Are you going to visit your family too? Or did you spring forth fully formed from Companion's Grove like the Queen's Own Companion does?"

John sat down and stuffed his feet into his best boots, staring at his hands as he did up the laces. "I'm on Court Duty and you know it, Rodney."

"You mean you never asked for any time off," Rodney snorted derisively. "Your family must suck even worse than mine does if you'd rather do Court Duty than spend the holiday with them. And you're telling _me_ to go spend time with _mine_?"

"The Queen needs me here, Rodney," John replied, annoyed. He wasn't sure what had gotten into Rodney lately. The man had been hovering over him like an overprotective nanny lately. "Besides which Puddlejumper is still just a baby. It wouldn't be fair of me to take Atlantis and him on that long of a trip."

 _Puddlejumper and I could easily do the trip if we went at a leisurely pace. It's not length that would be an issue, but speed_. Atlantis commented.

Rodney pointed at him with a triumphant look on his face. "Hah! Atlantis just told you that they could do it, didn't she?"

John scowled at him and tied his boot forcefully. "It doesn't matter if they could; the Queen still requires my presence here."

A knock came at John's door blocking Rodney’s attempt at a rejoinder. John opened it and blinked as Teyla and Lorne both stood there, looking somber. "What happened? Is Elizabeth okay?" he asked, a cold feeling settling into the pit of his stomach.

"Elizabeth is fine," Lorne said quickly, coming into the room and laying a hand on John's shoulder. Teyla slipped in behind him and shut the door with a quiet click. "I wouldn't be here if something had happened to her, you know that."

"But you are correct in assuming that we have bad news," Teyla added soberly. "John...John, the Queen just received news about your father." She reached out and grasped both his hands in hers. "I am sorry to inform you that your father has passed."

John froze, a wave of emotion rolling over him. He heard the sound a chair scraping the floor behind him and felt large hands grip his shoulders from behind. "John?" Rodney said worriedly, "John, are you...oh, never mind, of course you're not okay!" He tugged John over to the bed and pushed him down on it. "Here, sit down before you _fall_ down."

As Rodney stood worriedly over him on one side, hand on John's shoulder, Lorne sat on the end of the bed next to him, his expression one of concern. Teyla knelt in front of John and put her hands on his legs. "Do..." John rasped, and then stopped. He licked his lips to try to add some moisture to his suddenly dry mouth and tried again. "Do you know what happened?"

"The message sent by your brother said that his heart failed. It happened suddenly and there was nothing that the healer could do," she replied softly, gently rubbing his knee.

"Oh," John croaked. His chest felt tight. His father was gone and suddenly there were all these things that he wanted to say to the old man that he'd never be able to now. His vision blurred and he blinked fiercely to clear it.

 _Sweeting, I am here for you_ , Atlantis said, compassion ringing in her tone. He felt her reach out to him and wrap her presence around him like a hug. He accepted it gratefully, remembering their first night together and the grief she had shared with him over the loss of Holland.

"John..." Lorne paused, rubbed a hand over his head uncomfortably, and then continued, "Your brother asked Elizabeth to let you come home for the funeral. If you're up for it, she'd like for you to send her condolences as well. She can't leave Court right now."

John wiped a hand over his face and sighed. His father had been an influential duke and related by marriage to the royal family when his mother was still alive, so a royal presence of some sort would be expected. Teyla couldn’t leave Elizabeth’s side at this time and it wasn't safe for Elizabeth to travel unless it was unavoidable because of the traitors they still had not been able to find and neutralize. Duty called. "I'm hers to command. I won’t be able to travel quickly though. Not with Atlantis nursing Puddlejumper."

Teyla's forehead creased worriedly and she gripped his knee more firmly. "John, you are not obligated to do this."

He gave her a weak smile. "I'm a Herald, Teyla. My Queen needs me."

"I'm going too."

John whipped his head up to stare at Rodney. Rodney crossed his arms defensively and tilted his chin up stubbornly. "Rodney?"

"I said, I'm going too," Rodney replied stiffly to the questioning tone in John's voice. "Classes are closing down for Midwinter and I'll be free to keep you company."

Touched as John was by the offer, he still protested, "But, you're supposed to go see Jeannie for the holiday."

"I’m sure Jeannie will understand," Rodney shot back crisply. His expression then suddenly turned uncertain and he shifted awkwardly. "Besides which, I figure that it's my turn to be there for you. I mean you've nursed me through a couple of really bad reaction headaches because of my Gifts and you were there when Jeannie came to visit, so turnabout is fair play, right?"

John was going to protest again but Teyla laid her fingers across his lips with a warning look and then stood up and turned to Rodney, her expression pleased and fond. "That is very kind of you." She then reached up and pulled Rodney down so their heads touched. "I am sure that John will appreciate having you accompany him during this difficult time."

Rodney cleared his throat and pulled away, his hands flopping around gracelessly. "Well, um, okay. You're welcome."

Before John could protest again, Atlantis added, _Let him come, sweetheart. He just wants to be there to support you, like any friend would. Let him have the practice. He needs it_.

"Heralds Ronon, Vala and Cameron will be accompanying you as well, John," Teyla informed him.

"Now, wait a minute…"John began.

Teyla pinned him with a look. "This is not negotiable. You are the Heir Presumptive and you _will_ have guards to protect you while you are away from the Palace grounds. There will also be a troop of the Queen’s Guards going with you and you’ll be taking the Heir Presumptive Circlet as well."

Fuck. There was no way John could win a protocol argument with Teyla, especially over something like this. Outside of this room and his classes he was currently the Heir and she had recently become determined to not let anyone forget that for an instant. Not even him. "Yes, Queen’s Own," he managed to grit out.

And so John found himself on the road to his father’s funeral with an entire fucking retinue in tow along with Puddlejumper and Rodney. At least Rodney seemed impervious to the whole Heir thing because he spent the entire time on the road moaning at him about the weather (cold), the roads (slippery), his uniform (scratchy), the beds at the inns (lumpy), his saddle sores (ow), the Queen’s Guards (they snored), and Cadman (an annoying horse-faced freak of nature who could stop laughing at him _any minute now_ ). Between that and the annoyance of being constantly shadowed by Ronon, Vala or Cameron, John was able to not think about why he was traveling until they were in sight of his ancestral home.

"Wow, that looks cozy," Rodney said sarcastically, looking at the forbidding stone edifice ahead of them in the distance.

John’s memories leaped up at him. The games he used to play on the parapets with the servant’s kids, his father yelling at him to get down from there before he broke his neck. Doing goofy kid things in the bailey as his mother shook her head, amused. Racing his pony around the perimeter as his father shouted encouragement, his eyes approving. His eyes misted over and he blinked fiercely to clear them. "It wasn’t so bad," John murmured. Not when he’d been little. It was later on that everything had gone all pear-shaped.

Cameron came up alongside them, relieving Ronon, who dropped back to talk to Vala and the Guards. "So, John, this is the old ancestral?"

John turned to him. "Yeah."

Cameron sucked on his teeth briefly. "You know, even though I know you're Elizabeth's cousin, somehow I never pictured you as coming from a place like that."

John shrugged. "I walked away from it a long time ago."

Cameron grinned at him. "I guess we all have. I’m not the guy I would have been if I hadn’t been Chosen by Haikon, here. Still, this is a bit more impressive than my childhood home in Sweetwater."

"Are you kidding me? That monstrosity is bigger than the entire _town_ of Sweetwater," Rodney said, waving his hand accusingly at the place. "And your family rattles around in it all by themselves, I bet."

John flushed, feeling vaguely embarrassed by his family’s wealth. "Well, them and the servants and the guards and their families, yeah."

"Excuse me. I’m sorry I didn’t remember to factor in the army of people it takes to keep a place like that maintained and clean," Rodney replied, rolling his eyes.

Cameron’s attention drifted elsewhere for a moment, then he snapped back into awareness. "Heads up, people, we’ve been spotted by the guards on the parapets."

Rodney snorted. "Between all the dazzling white you guys are wearing and the Companions, I’d suspect them of being blind if they hadn’t seen us by now."

He had a point, thought John, remembering spotting Heralds coming to the castle when he was younger. He looked down at Atlantis’ ears and asked, _How’s ‘Jumper doing?_

 _He is fine, John_ , Atlantis replied as she looked tolerantly at her offspring bouncing along beside her, easily keeping up with the pace set by the Guard’s horses. _How are you?_

 _Nervous,_ he admitted.

 _Your brother did ask for you to come,_ Atlantis reminded him. _You’re both older now. Things change._

John sighed. _Maybe._

***

They were welcomed in by the seneschal who apologized for Dave’s absence due to an issue that had arisen that needed his attention. After taking care of their Companions, the Heralds were shown to their rooms to allow them to freshen up from the road and told that the funeral would start in a candlemark. John found himself in his old rooms and was swamped by memories again until he heard banging on his door. Collecting himself, he opened the door and noticed with squirming discomfort that Cameron stood off to the side of the doorway, blatantly on guard, while Rodney stood in front of him.

"Gods, this place is a rabbit warren," Rodney exclaimed, striding in past John. John noted how good he looked in his Court Grays. He hadn’t known that the uniform dispensary even made Court Grays for Herald-trainees. Teyla had probably made sure that he had a set for this trip. It was the kind of thing that she’d think of. "Your family ever lose anyone in this place? Demented uncle? Small children?"

As a matter of fact, John had gotten loose once as a small toddler and not been found for five hours, but damned if John was going to tell Rodney that. He turned away from the door to smirk at him. "Nope. Everybody’s accounted for."

"Amazing," Rodney replied dryly. "Cadman has a number of things to say about the grooms in the barn, most of which would peel paint if I repeated them. Your family apparently hires idiots that can’t tell the difference between a Companion and a horse. Those idiots locked all their stalls after we left."

John sighed. "I know, Atlantis told me. Folks get used to dealing with horses a certain way and it’s hard to make them understand that even though a Companion is horse-shaped, it’s not a horse."

Cameron cleared his throat, and John’s eyes were pulled back to the doorway.

"I didn’t think you’d come." Dave leaned against the doorjamb and crossed his arms. He was dressed in formal court mourning clothes. It made him look even more like their father and the judgmental look just added to it. John found himself straightening his posture defensively.

Rodney nervously cleared his throat and bowed awkwardly to Dave. "Your Excellency, I’m sorry for your loss."

Dave’s gaze shifted over to Rodney in surprise. The surprise grew as he took in the uniform Rodney wore. "Ah, thank you, Herald-trainee…?"

Rodney straightened, folded his arms and tilted up his chin. "Master Scholar Rodney McKay, your Excellency."

"You know what they say - ‘Companions choose when and where they will’," John quoted the old saw with a smirk, stepping in front of Rodney protectively. He drew himself up formally and smoothed out his expression. "Your Excellency, Queen Elizabeth sends her condolences on your loss and regrets that she was not able to come in person to tell you so."

Dave’s mouth twisted sourly, but he nodded formally in return. "I thank Her Majesty for her kind thoughts." He then stepped back out into the hallway, said, "Heralds, I will leave you to get ready. Please inform my staff of any needs you may have," and stalked away. Cameron gave them a wry look and closed the door.

 _I do not think he was pleased by your formality_ , Atlantis commented. _Were you trying to provoke him?_

 _My breathing provokes Dave,_ John replied shortly. He then sighed and brought a hand up to pinch the bridge of his nose. _Sorry lady. Being around my family brings out the worst in me, apparently._

"He sure has a stick up his ass," Rodney muttered under his breath as he came up beside John and laid a hand on his shoulder. _Are you okay?_

John startled at the unexpected touch of Rodney’s mind, all silky and bright quicksilver, making John’s spine tingle. _Uh, hanging in there,_ he hedged, cursing the fact that one couldn’t convincingly lie mind to mind.

 _Hah, I knew you had to have some kind of Gift!_ Rodney crowed, satisfaction soaking his thoughts. _You had to have something or you wouldn't have been Chosen. Since Vala mentioned that most Heralds are Mindspeakers, I figured I had even odds. Why didn't you tell me?_ The question had a distinct feeling of hurt wrapped around it.

 _To be honest, I kind of keep forgetting that I can use it with anyone other than Atlantis,_ John replied a little sheepishly. He wanted to slap himself for misreading Rodney's reluctance to Mindspeak with unfamiliar people as the same as John's desire for absolute mental privacy. As a friend John should have offered to help the guy practice. _My ability to Mindspeak other Heralds is pretty limited distance-wise and it's always seemed kind of silly to go the effort when I can just as easily find them and say something to them, you know?_ Anyways, the emphasis in the training of his Gifts had been in an entirely different direction.

Rodney’s next thought was tinged with relief. _Oh, well, yes, that makes sense._ He shuffled his feet for a moment, then asked, _Do you mind if we talk this way? Because before we left, Teyla said that it would be best if I watched what I said around the servants and family and stuff because of politics…  
_  
 _But you might explode from all the stupid people around you if you don’t have any place to vent?_ John finished for him with a smirk.  
Rodney flushed a bit. _Something like that?  
_  
 _Well, if it'll keep you from exploding messily, then I don't mind,_ John replied, gently teasing.

Rodney looked down at the ground for a moment and then back up at John, his blue eyes clear and slightly anxious. _And maybe you could also stand having someone to confide in where nobody else can hear as well? I mean, if you want. No pressure or anything. I know how you are._  
  
The truth of Rodney’s thoughts rang through John. Rodney did know him. Rodney did understand. _Thanks, buddy,_ John replied, feeling a little overwhelmed. _I appreciate the offer._ He then cleared his throat and moved away from Rodney, feeling oddly exposed and uncertain after their mental conversation. "I’d better get ready," he said, falling back on duty in an effort to regain his composure. "The funeral is less than a candlemark away and I still need to change into my Court uniform."

"Right," Rodney agreed awkwardly. He pointed over his shoulder with his thumb. "I’ll just wait outside with Cramden then."

"You mean Cameron," John corrected, the corner of his mouth quirking upward slightly. Rodney was so bad with names it was kind of hilarious.

"Whatever. Does it really matter what Mr. Wholesome Farmboy at the door’s name is?" Rodney replied a little defensively.

John snorted in amusement and waved him on to the door as he picked up the bag that contained one of his Court uniforms. "Go on, Rodney, I’ll meet you guys out there in a minute after I get this stupid thing on."

***

It was bad enough wearing a Court uniform, but putting on the Heir Presumptive Circlet was even worse. The only comfort John had was that at least it wasn’t the Heir's Circlet. It wasn’t that it was gaudy, ostentatious or heavy. Like all the crowns and circlets of the Valdemar royal family, it was stark and restrained, a simple narrow band of gold, embarrassingly plain in comparison to those of other kingdoms. It was what it symbolized that John found so hard to carry as he walked into the temple and heard the whispers start.

He shut it all out and focused on following the usher to his seat up on the dais with Dave, his stepmother and the rest of his family. Ronon and Cameron arrayed themselves behind him as Rodney and Vala placed themselves at his sides.

The priest and his acolytes came out of the back chamber and began the formal death rites. John let the words buzz over him as he watched the incense wreath the room and the priest asperge blessed water onto the coffin. He murmured the prayers to the Mother and Father with everyone else at the appropriate times, let the hymns from the temple chorus wash over him, and listened to sounds of his stepmother and sister-in-law weeping copiously into their handkerchiefs as he sat there, blank inside.

As the priest came up to the family dais to bless them and read to them the Consolation and Assurance, a warm hand landed on his shoulder and squeezed. John glanced over and saw that it was Rodney, concern writ large on his face. _Do you want me to get you drunk later? I brought stuff if you need it._  
  
The warmth and caring of Rodney’s thoughts thawed something frozen inside John and he blinked back tears. His father was dead. Dead and John would never see him again; never have the opportunity to heal the breach between them. _Please,_ he replied.

Rodney squeezed his shoulder again, _Okay._ He then let go, giving John the warning, _Heads up, you’re about to be subjected to the smells and bells routine._  
  
John turned his attention back to the priest who stood before him and held out his hands for the priest to anoint his palms in sacred oil with the symbols for the Mother and Father. That done, he let the words of the Consolation and Assurance wash over him without really listening, instead focusing on Rodney’s steady presence at his side. He was grateful now that Teyla had squashed his protests against Rodney coming.

Finally the funeral rites came to a close and everyone was ushered outside. John watched as his father’s remains were interred into the family vault. As the priest locked the vault door, John felt another upwelling of grief and immediately after that Rodney’s hand on his shoulder and Atlantis’ wordless comfort in his mind. He subtly leaned into both and took a deep breath to calm himself. After this, all he had to do was get through the wake and then he’d finally be free let Rodney get him falling down drunk. He’d need it tonight.

Everyone was shown into the main hall and servants circulated through the room, distributing hot mulled cider and wine. John accepted a mug of cider gratefully and sipped at it desultorily, more interested in the warmth that it provided to his chilled hands than the taste of it. Rodney and Ronon stuck close to him, both of them frowning at anyone who came close to him and being generally intimidating, while Vala and Cameron worked the crowd. Hopefully Vala wouldn't pick too many of his relatives’ pockets.

As his gaze swept the room, he noticed Dave part from a cluster of distant cousins that John vaguely remembered and head his direction. John braced himself for another go round with his brother.

"Heir Presumptive," Dave said, bowing formally.

"Your Excellency," John replied, cautiously inclining his head.

"I don’t believe I’ve been introduced to all of your fellow Heralds yet," Dave commented, obviously meaning Ronon, but his look was reserved for Rodney.

John bristled, but managed to throttle his inclination to dive into the fight and responded mildly, "This is Weaponsmaster Herald Ronon," he tilted his head toward Ronon, who crossed his arms and looked impassively at his brother. Nodding to the two Heralds wandering the hall, John said, "That over there is Herald Cameron, and she’s Herald Vala." John then tilted his head toward Rodney, cool challenge in his eyes. "Master Scholar and Herald-trainee Rodney, you’ve already met."

Dave raised an eyebrow at Rodney. "I thought that those who were Chosen had to give up their previous life to answer the calling."

Rodney narrowed his eyes at Dave and John hastily interjected, "Rodney is invaluable as a teacher to the Collegium and it was decided that he would continue to teach his classes in addition to taking Heraldic training."

Rodney smirked and added, "One doesn’t waste valuable skills, Your Excellency, as I’m sure you know."

"Oh, I don’t know about that," Dave replied, his eyes flickering over to John briefly. "I’ve seen people do it before."

John pressed his lips together, so as not to say anything. He was here as a representative of the Queen and it would do the kingdom no good for him to react to his brother’s petty taunts, however much he would like to do so.

"I’ve also seen people not appreciate something good because they were too busy whining that it wasn’t as mediocre as they were," Rodney shot back, his tone sharp.

"Mediocre, you say?" Dave asked coolly, and John broke out in a cold sweat at the challenge inherent in the tone. It signaled that his brother was feeling insulted.

Rodney’s chin tilted upward defiantly. "Yes, mediocre. Humdrum, insignificant, second-rate, undistinguished and inferior. Lacking in any stellar qualities. Dull and stupid, if you want it summed up in small words."

 _Rodney, what the hells are you doing?_ John thought at him desperately.

 _If I’m doing it right, hopefully I’m calling your jerk of a brother an idiot. I think Dame Heightmeyer called this method the implied insult,_ Rodney replied, his chin lifting even higher. Righteous indignation suffused his thoughts.

By the look on Dave’s face, Rodney had definitely succeeded in just that. John repressed a sigh. Leave it to Rodney to take Etiquette classes and only pick up a more sophisticated way to call someone a moron.

"I see," Dave finally replied, once he’d finally gotten his expression under control. "Heir Presumptive, may I have a word with you in private?"

"No," Ronon said, his tone a little lower and more growly than usual. At Dave’s affronted look, he added, "The Heir Presumptive must be accompanied by his body guards at all times. Queen’s orders."

Dave sighed and abruptly deflated in front of John’s surprised eyes. "Fine. Heir Presumptive, if you could tell my brother that I’d like to see him some day? I was hoping that he’d make it to the funeral, but apparently he couldn’t come." He turned and began walking away.

"Dave," John rasped brokenly. Then Ronon gave a shout and shoved him to the side as a searing point of pain hit him. He looked down and blinked stupidly at the knife embedded in the right side of his chest. The room began to dim around him and the last thing John saw before everything went black was Rodney's terrified expression.


End file.
